It's a Friday night and your best friend calls you crying to tell that he's getting divorced by his wife. After an hour of consoling him, you head to the store before it closes to buy some milk. Whilst at the counter you glance at the newspaper stand and see the headlines. Another woman has been brutally murdered by an illegal immigrant in the next neighborhood over. Someone has also been charged with $2 billion dollars in tax evasion. You put the $4.40 for Soy milk on credit. On the way home you walk a slightly different route and notice another business has foreclosed. Passing by two people sleeping on cardboard in the street, you spot two paper cups for donations. You reason to yourself briefly that you'd maybe have given to something if you had some spare change but 90% of stores are cashless now anyway. A cold breeze hits you, it's 45°F (7°C) and Winter is on the way. When you get home you turn on the TV and briefly hear that 40,000 more Palestinians have been killed in airstrikes in Gaza. Flipping channels for something to watch you come across the new original Star Wars story by Disney. After finishing the first episode you're scratching your head wondering what you just watched. The last 15 minutes was about the struggle of two transexual Ewoks and their gay Gungan husbands. You decide it's time for bed.

You wake up the next day on Saturday to a text waiting from your girlfriend Stacy. Eyes glancing over the words "I couldn't sleep last night." You ask her what's been on her mind and whilst you're getting dressed she sends you a reply. "I can't help but think that what I've been looking for my whole life is an open relationship." Your first thought is how it took her 5 years to tell you this. Maybe you should have asked her to move in a few years ago, but she has that b*tch of a chihuahua. The last time you can even remember that you felt like asking, the thought of it doing its business all over your Arhaus sofa made you hold your tongue. You need time to think about a suitable reply anyway so you continue with your plan to head to the gym for your morning workout.

The usual 3 short blondes are at the gym again, all standing around one of the glute machines. Two are wearing Gymshark pants that look to be one size too small and they're mostly just talking and sending photos on Snapchat. You can't understand what they're saying over Ed Sheeran's "Shape of You" and you don't care anyway. Whilst on the treadmill you're constantly distracted by what Stacy said earlier. Your Mom just asked you a month ago if you had considered proposing this year but you remember on one of your first dates with Stacy she said she wasn't interested in getting married or having children maybe ever. It's also now too late to get a refund for the tickets to Paris you've paid for. A frown forms as you realize now you're going to have to find another person to play Stardew Valley with on the Switch or just give up on the farm altogether.

As you leave the gym you take your headphones off. None of your usual playlists are cutting it now and you're too distracted to listen to Ed Sheeran or Imagine Dragons anyway. Whilst waiting for the bus you start googling for new music but end up distracted by a mostly-naked photo of Katy Perry halfway down a WhatCulture "Top 10 best bands" page. When you get home you load up your usual p*rn site and 20 minutes later you're in the shower with the familiar feeling of guilt and anxiety starting to soak in. You don't usually take your anti-depressants until 5PM but a few hours early isn't going to matter that much. Actually you were meant to discuss ending your perscription at your next therapy session but now you figure you'll need to postpone that another 6, maybe 12 months. Your phone rings. It's Stacy and she seems to have also messaged you a dozen times but you still haven't answered her after this morning. She's probably having another anxiety attack... You really couldn't handle that or talking to her now. The phone goes back into your pocket.

It's almost 12PM and the next thing you know you're sitting in front of the computer in a competitive Overwatch lobby waiting for a match. As soon as you join some kid immediately starts yelling into his mic and cursing so you mute the whole team. By half-time, it's clear your team is throwing so you switch to second tank but it's already too late. The match is over and you pull out your phone. Stacy has tried to call 4 times so you quickly shoot her a message to get her off your back. "I'm just at gym, let's talk a bit later". Closing the videogame, your p*rn tab is still open in Firefox, so you go for another round. Whatever.

It's somehow 2 hours later and you've used up the rest of the weed Stacy gave you last Thursday. Putting her bong down, you go the fridge to crack open a beer and order some pizza from Doordash. You aren't cooking today. Whilst waiting for the food you decide you'll just wing the whole convo, so you call her up. The conversation is pretty boring and you don't even talk about her mention of "open relationship" and most of the 30 minutes was just her complaining about one of her friends, plus she didn't say "I love you" back either. She was also pissed off you smoked all the weed on your own. Whatever. Whatever.

You scroll through your contacts and cold text your ex Becky to ask what's up. She leaves you on read. You're bored and the food still hasn't arrived so you download Tinder and try to remember the bio you went with 5 years ago. You haven't taken any photos in years, but rationalize that you're probably jumping the gun anyway. You can probably figure this all out together in Paris in 2 weeks. During that thought your Mom calls and after small-talk you mention what Stacy texted. She's kind of confused "Oh. I didn't realize you both had that kind of relationship." You get annoyed and end the call in a hurry. Actually you think you probably should have told your best friend first, as he quickly suggests you both just go to the new bar that opened up in his neighborhood and get wasted and see what happens. At least you now have a plan for the night.

The pizza was meh and the second episode of the new Star Wars makes you regret watching the first even more. You wish they'd just do something relatable. This might be the first time you don't feel like buying the LEGO set they'll release for this series. You had a feeling to play Stardew Valley but not by yourself and it's nearly time to go to the bar with your friend anyway. At the bar you take a table at the back and after a few drinks your mate is crying about his divorce. You open Tinder and ask him to help you figure out a bio. "Oh man I dunno are you sure you want to do that already?" is his reply. You shrug and he starts crying again after you tell him that your relationships were all from Tinder. Looking around you see a few couples together and a couple of guys drinking alone. A thought crosses your mind that both of you might be joining them soon.

The next morning you wake up with a slight hangover. Becky finally replied but it was just "I'm good, u?" It's Sunday and thinking about having to work tomorrow makes you feel like calling in sick first thing. You'd just finished telling your therapist that you hate being a male midwife nurse anyway and why did he have to be on vacation right now too? Your next appointment is over a month away and you need more weed but you should probably save the money. Your usual p*rn site isn't working for some reason so you pull yourself together to go to the gym. 2 of the 3 girls are there as usual, this time getting hit on by some African guy you've seen a few times. You don't feel like doing legs today so you go with something light on the treadmill. Stacy calls and you step off to answer. "Why the heck did Liam's girlfriend call me and tell me that you had downloaded Tinder?" She's totally freaking out. Your feelings are mixed between anger, anxiety and apathy. You hang up on her and she starts texting you furiously. So you mute your phone. Actually you turn it off, you don't want to listen to music anyway. Increasing the treadmill speed you notice the African guy is taking photos for those blonde girls. You think you've seen them work out for a whole 5 minutes in a week.

As you walk in the door Stacy and her chihuahua are there on the couch. You're a bit shocked as you hadn't anticipated she'd just let herself in with the key you gave her. "Take Milo off the couch please" you start but she's already yelling at you and crying. After standing there for a few minutes quietly hoping your neighbors don't file another complaint for fighting, she's calmed down a bit but hasn't stopped crying. You start with how you were just fooling around with Liam and didn't even make a profile. Just downloaded Tinder so no big deal. She doesn't care. Instead she complains that she's wanted to download Tinder dozens of times but never ended up doing it because she clearly cares more than you do. Stacy starts loading up her bong with some weed she brought but doesn't offer you any. As you go out to the balcony for some air she tells you to stay in the living room. "We'll figure it out in Paris" you begin but she interrupts you to say she has 'second thoughts' about the whole trip. Seriously? She'd been bothering you for years about Paris and you saved for months to even afford just the flights. Now she doesn't want to go? Your thought is interrupted when she asks what other 'stupid stuff' you've done this weekend and then suddenly puts out her hand and asks to see your phone. Immediately you tell her no. You've had enough. This is all wrong. Every single bit of it. Every single bit.

You're seeing red. So you quickly take your keys off the hook and walk out without even a word. You can hear her footsteps coming after you but you bolt up the stairs and hear her heading down. You've thrown her off but now you're upstairs on your own hiding like a coward. You take the other side of the building back to your apartment and lock the door. The couch smells like chihuahua. You really do hate that dog. You text Liam that you're coming over and that you're going to break up with Stacy. The relationship is over and you don't care. You'll figure it out as you go and pick up some more weed on the way over to Liam's place for both of you. Liam texts back not to come. He's booked a last minute vacation to Paris with his wife to talk her out of the divorce. Paris... You don't want to think about that. You don't feel like p*rn. You don't feel like gaming. You don't even feel like smoking. You don't feel like anything. Then you remember you have work tomorrow. You are definitely going to call in sick.

It's already the early afetrnoon and whilst making a Tinder profile you notice Stacy blocked you on Facebook, but she's texted you a few times via old SMS. Ugh... You'll let her figure out how to get her stuff out of your place and figure the only thing of yours that you really care about at her place are some of your Amiibos. Going for a walk to pick up weed for your day off work tomorrow, you pass by the local church and have no idea what denomination it is until you see the word "Baptist". It's still Sunday and you can hear singing inside. The church is pretty and it's now quite cold outside. Whilst looking at the building, someone up at the entrance greeting guests sees you and waves you closer. You don't know what it is but you feel compelled to at least go inside for a bit out of the cold. At the top of the steps the person greets you smiling and as they slightly bow, you instinctively nod your head back. You cross the threshold...

It's 2 years later and you've just finished telling this testimony to others at one of your church's life groups. When asked, you reply "Well most of all I am grateful to God for freeing me of p*rn for over 1 year." Your friends from church are smiling back at you. "What happened to Liam, did he get a divorce?" one member asks. "I went to Paris alone" you laugh "but that's where Liam's wife told him she'd found someone else". Someone mutters "What a poor guy". You think about how you've been praying for Liam now for almost 2 years. His ex has moved on but he's totally broken hearted. Initially he laughed at you when you said you'd found Jesus. You thought you were better friends than that. In fact you were shocked that your other friends and even family were so happy for you but your best friend thought it all a joke. You'll keep praying that he'll see the light. If God can save a wretch like you. He can save anyone. You didn't realise you said that last bit out loud. "Amen!" one of the girls says and you all start laughing. Whilst walking home, you try to recall some more of your past but it's all like a blur. You don't smoke weed, watch p*rn, date casually, take anti-depressants or play videogames or watch TV anymore. Yet you've never been happier and can't even count how many friends you now have.

As you open the door of your home. You get down on your knees to welcome and catch your almost 1 year old son trying to walk to you. "Welcome home darling". It's been almost 2 years but you still love the sound of those words from your wife. You met quite soon after Stacy dumped you. God's timing is always perfect. With all of your past habits, you never could have imagined having a partner like her. Dinner is already ready. As you sit down to say grace, you choose your words. "Loving father, thank you for the family you have blessed me with. Thank you for for food on our table. Lord thank you... Thank you for not giving up on me when I knew nothing. Thank you Jesus... for everything". You choke through a few more words and stop. Through the tears in your eyes, you see the two beautiful faces of your wife and son. You're home, you're safe and you're saved.